The following will get you kicked out of the stadium and basically banned from coming back!!!
» Behavior that is unruly, disruptive, or illegal in nature.
» Intoxication or other signs of alcohol impairment that results in irresponsible behavior.
» Foul or abusive language or obscene gestures.
» Interference with the progress of the game (including throwing objects onto the field).
» Failing to follow instructions of stadium personnel.
» Verbal or physical harassment of opposing team fans.
"Any fan in violation of these provisions will be subject to ejection without refund and loss of ticket privileges for future games."
First off, unruly and disruptive. That is so vague! Who defines if it is unruly or disruptive? Heaven forbid that some tea-toting soccer Mom goes to a game; whole sections would be considered unruly and disruptive. Hell, some stadium's security can't even get all their employees on the same page on who can, and who can not, kiss who at a game. This is just asking for trouble right off the bat.
The second one I don't have any problem with; it is basically already the norm. If you get drunk and try to jump off of the edge to the lower seats, you will get yourself ejected. Oh, well, or sent to the hospital if you actually make it over the ledge.
Onto the next rule... Wait, what! No foul language or flipping the bird! What the *bleep* are those *bleeping* *bleeps* smoking? (Yeah, doesn't have the same feeling to it, does it?) So if my team throws an interception, what am I going to say? Darn it? When asked about the Cowboys am I suppose to say, "I really dislike that team." Or when asked about Brett Favre I should say, "I really don't care for him as a person." Fuck no! I hate them with a passion, why the fuck would I dilute that you dumb-ass nfl morons. (See, how that last sentence got my point across so much better.)
The fourth and fifth rules are also already the norm and pretty much make sense. I only say pretty much, because to the people who have been thrown out games before for breaking these rules, they did not make sense to them. Well at least they didn't at the time. Either that or they were only trying to save face by yelling and screaming that the rules are stupid and unfair while they were being carried out. I have a positive outlook on humanity so I like to think this is the case, either that or the next morning when one of their friends tells them what they did and shows them the videos posted on Youtube, they realize that no, the rules aren't stupid, they are.
And finally, why I am screwed!
"Verbal or physical harassment of opposing team fans."
Ah shit.
This next season I am going to the Patriots/Niners game at Candlestick so I think I am safe - for now. I am going to bet that I get banned from Qwest field first. At first I thought it was a fair chance at it being either Candlestick or Qwest, but I just can not bring myself to believe that Candlestick staff would chuck little old me out. In past games a Niner fan practically had to beg to be thrown out, and those were not even the Raiders or Cowboys games.
4 comments:
Golly gee, those Patriots sure are gonna give your Niners a wholesome spanking, too!
When I said that I thought I was safe this year going to the Niners/Patriots game, I did not mean I was going to go light on you or your team. I just meant that from such a pretty-boy team as the Patriots and their fans, I am not expecting much back.
We'll see. We may be one of the more sportsmanship-heavy fan bases (like my rewording there?), yeah, but after enough beers we're still just a bunch of drunk Mass-holes ;-)
Oh great. So just about the time that you guys will actually become entertaining, I won't be able to understand if you are saying bar or ba'ing like a sheep.
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